I am setting out to make a change.

I have a habit that annoys me to no end, and I’m actually quite sure it annoys others around me too. Because negativity and complaining and pointing out the yuck parts of a circumstance is annoying. And I do that way.too.much.

I remember distinctly the first time I had someone tell me that I was a negative person. It actually kinda wrecked me for a little while, because I wasn’t used to that kind of criticism, even the helpful and constructive kind. But then I realized this person was right: I was a complainer.

I worked on it for a while, and it got better. I was conscious of when I was being a complainer and shut myself off from saying something when it wasn’t helpful or constructive. But I feel like lately I’ve fallen into the trap of complaining again, and I’m ready to stop. I complain about the silliest things really…being too cold, electronics not working like I think they should, slow cars in the fast lane, traffic in general, slow service at a restaurant, non-perfect coffee, cold food, etc. etc. etc. Some days I have this running tally of all the things that aren’t quite right, and it’s just annoying now.

So I’m setting out to make a change.

I’m taking a week to focus in on not complaining. I’m giving myself fifty dollars to spend on something for myself, but every time I utter a complaint during the next seven days, five dollars gets deducted from that amount. Maybe I’ll have enough left over at the end to at least buy a new pair of socks or something. Oh, oops…was that negative? Thankfully I haven’t started the challenge yet, hehe.

I’m really hoping that to take these seven days to focus on changing this bad habit of mine will make me really think about my words and the spirit I project with them. Cheers to positivity!

What about you: do you find it easy to speak out the negative things of a circumstance or happening? How are you intentional about being positive in spite of negative things?

I’d love to hear your thoughts!

Back in November, Ben and I took a few days for a little getaway in Tennessee. It was the most special time together with lots of coffee and conversation and relaxation, not to mention staying in a really beautiful and comfortable Airbnb with the most amazing hosts. It was our first experience using an Airbnb reservation, so we weren’t totally sure what to expect…but it was a great experience and one I would be happy to repeat again.

One of the things we wanted to do while we spent these few days away together was create a list of the things we value…the things we want to uphold in our future and teach our children. We simply termed the list “our family values,” and it was really inspiring to sit and talk about the things that matter to us and that we want to pass on to the generation behind us. I think it’s really important to be intentional about realizing the things that you value, whether it’s for yourself personally or your family or business or any other avenue of life. I have found that without intentionality, things tend to regress, not progress. I find it hard sometimes to be intentional about things, whether it’s relationships or doing special things for my husband or making time for quiet and rest…but the reward for doing so is always worth the effort put forth.

Here are some of the things we value and want to instill in our family:

The fear of God.

Honesty and truthfulness.

Respect and value for life.

Gratitude and generosity.

Creativity and dreams.

Connection.

Cheer and laughter.

It’s a simple list, but the best things in life are simple. We wrote a short bullet point under each of these values as well to encapsulate our reasons and thought behind each value, and eventually I want to create a print of this list to put in our living room or somewhere visible in our home so that we are reminded of the things we stand for in life. It’s not enough to float along on the winds of change and culture. I believe that as followers of Jesus it is vitally important to proactively resist the things in the world that want to take us into places that we really don’t want to go. I know how easy it is to fall prey to wrong or even just slightly “off” mindsets without even realizing it, and then suddenly you look back and see where you’ve fallen away from something precious and valuable. Our family value list is just a small way we want to be proactive with ourselves and our children in keeping to the path and ways that we believe are right.

There are a million other things we could add to this list that are important to us (you know, like, coffee and travel and chocolate and long weekend breakfasts), but we opted to make this master list short, brief, and pointed. I love having these things written down and to be reminded of them often, and then to pass them on to the little ones behind us.

What about you: do you find it difficult to be intentional about certain aspects of life? What are some of your values?

I’d love to hear your thoughts!